Duality and other irreversibles

People I [currently] love

2010-12-08T05:15:00.000-08:00

Jugant Biswas, aka JUGGLES aka BEAR aka a lot of other names he'd kill me for mentioning, is my rock. If anyone messes with this kid, i'll fucking cut them up into little bits.

Aman Chauhan, aka KFC aka PLAT aka SAANP, is special. Lets just keep it at that, yeah.

Rahul Arora aka WALRUS, is plain and simple - wonderful.

Kirtika Sinha Devburman, aka MOMMY aka LE FROG aka CHOCOLATE THIEF, is the re-incarnation of God. Seriously. ['cept when she snores :-(]

The last photograph of J n I was taken by the guys at Subway.. we're on their "most valued customer" list after we got them to create a MASSIVE 16-meat sandwich. 1 grand = 2 sandwiches. J finished his and i barely touched mine - BIG SURPRISE

Happy.Ish.

2010-12-05T01:08:00.000-08:00

I am back, at the behest of Jayeeta [Ganguly].

Can't believe this blog is still around, that things have changed for the better, and that i am beginning to feel like myself again. It's like that bit in Legally Blonde where Elle gets on the treadmill and kicks Warner Huntington in the balls. Feels super good. :-)

Buying books again, and WILL finish my own draft by the 31st of this month, pinky promish. So far im stuck on the bit where the anti-protagonist is swinging between the RX 100 and the Enfield, stuck on one and wanting the other so bad.
Haha.

There's also a certain Avenger in the picture, but we'll get to that when im drunk.

My life currently consists of TV shows, Music, a bear and a platypus, and lots and lots of interesting strangers.

Thassit for now.
Im out.
Paix.
P

Been ages again

2010-09-01T06:02:00.000-07:00

haven't been upto anything in a while .... shamefully admit to new obsession with make-up.

got loads to do, plenty of good ideas, but the habit of doing everything differently is leading to a number of irritating roadblocks.

routine was never my best friend but sometimes you need to push yourself harder, even when the humidity in the air and those tempting cartoon downloads are begging you to kick your legs up and laze.

it is so fucking hard. if i had known that giving into slothfullness was going to have these repurcussions, i would have bought myself a case of Red Bull and extra smokes.

Oh Hello

2010-04-20T19:36:00.000-07:00

I havent been able to settle down in one place long enough. All these months since November, its been hop on/off a plane/train/bike/bumpy car, from one place to another. Filming like a maniac, thats the easy part. Editing's a bitch when you're not "into" it. And truth be told, i dont feel very "in" to anything right now. Call it the weather or look at how tired my fingers are from counting how many people ape what i do, and then freak the fuck out when i comment on their very obviously-emulated actions.

I dont mind anymore though, so im not angry about it. It is a pleasure to be copied, for people to think that whatever little i do actually matters enough for them to go ahead and do the same thing. I like being a trendsetter, it feels good. So yeah, i am not angry. Quite pleased actually.

Just realized that i actually don't like people. Really.

There's too many of them, and most of them are stupid/useless/unambitious

We're overpopulated and in Kolkata, this is NOT helpful, especially during traffic jams, at malls and during those moments when you're figuring out your birthday list in the hope of throwing a "small" party

A lot of people use other people, and thats fine [normal, apparently] but what gets to me is the way they will pretend to be your friend, worm their way into your life, take whoever/whatever they want and then give YOU attitude when you comment about their being very like those reeds they talked about in Julius Caeser.

I dislike more people in summer for one obvious reason [snotty little kids under age 5 especially the ones on flights when you canNot avoid them] - they smell worse than they usually would in a non-summery context.

They talk waaay too much. About shit that does not involve them/their loved ones [present and former]/their lives and futures in any perceivable way. Usually their gabbing revolves around someone else, and will more often than not, be non-positive in nature.

Ok, no more. Good Night.

2010-02-22T22:27:00.000-08:00

Over the low, thank god !

Pepsi is good for fizzless times, the extra sugar [that you dont get with Thums Up] helps raise endorphin levels.
Yeah ok im not tuned in with how body juice works, but yeah this shit wakes me up better than anything else.

Tripod phobia is now tripod obsession.

Russell Peters, Katt Williams, Jeff Dunham - I love you guys.

c***

2010-02-18T06:32:00.000-08:00

Professionalism in India has always been half-assed, especially when training programmes are over and its expectation time.
I've been used by numerous programmes as a mascot or "person with potential" and im really tired now.
So yeah, thank you for your wonderful training and shitty coordination, and no im not interested in busting my ass and fucking my priorities up just so that you can look good for your dunderhead funders. And fuck you if you take offence. Your "current" idea was my idea first. So Fuck You.

Pune

2010-02-16T17:32:00.000-08:00

Nobody will ever be able to justify terrorism to me. A cousin who happens to be a politician, tried telling me why the Maharashtra-based psycho group, the MNS had a point in terrorizing the state in a bid to get rid of non-Maharashtrians.
It didn't work. Silly politician.

When 26/11 happened we woke up to the fact that this country IS in fact, diverse and culturally-super rich, a fact that has been proved over the years by white people and other xenophobia-inducing parties, but never really acknowledged by us, barring Republic Day, Independence Day and all those times when Pakistan says we're uncool.

Why is it so hard to tell bad people to fuck off ?

I think its high time i did that, regardless of whether they read this or not.

This is Bal Thackeray with Michael Jackson in Mumbai. That's funny, MJ never sang a single Marathi song in his entire career.

Bal Kaku, the reason why you're pissed with us non-Marathi's is actually because your name is spelt B-A-A-L, and that by itself is a joke... just like the rest of you.

I find it hard to actually come up with appropriate things to say about the Pune blast at German Bakery. Young lives were lost, people are struggling for life and as usual, the authorities are working at snail's pace to figure out what exactly happened. A Pakistani outfit called something - e-something toiba owned up to the attack.

Stop Killing People, Damnit.

R.I.P Abhishek Saxena , a student who passed away moments ago.

Salt Lake BB Block siblings Anindyee and Ankik will be missed. Anindyee was on Facebook, reading her wall posts was painful. Arunabha went to school with her, hope he's holding up ok.

R.I.P to the people who were there and didn't make it. We don't know their names, and probably never will, their bodies were really badly charred. Nadia, Binita...

I can't write anymore, it just hurts.

You cannot fucking shut down McQueen

2010-02-11T16:29:00.000-08:00

I know the man is dead, but that doesnt mean you completely shut him out of fashion history. There will never be another Alex, but for fucks sake, look at how well other houses are functioning post-death of their original founders... Dior, Balenciaga, YSL, Chanel and Burberry being a few "living" examples.

It took me a long time to write this because i am neither fashionably pimped out nor enough of a fashion victim to fully grasp the design genius of a fashion designer. Most clothes i see on the runways at fashion weeks cannot actually be worn by a regular or above-average size person; so i'd rather rant about fashion than be happy about its existence.

In the same breath, there are a few fabulous creative geniuses out there whose work truly stands out, despite the garments in question not being fat/big-boob friendly.

Alexander McQueen waS one of those super fabs, whose vibrant, Lady GaGa inspired collections will not be forgotten in a hurry.

RIP Baby. \m/

The Perfect Wednesday Night

2010-02-10T14:57:00.001-08:00

Spray paint in my hair and under my nails

Rainbow splatter on the floor *im gonna get baked tomorrow morning*

Old furniture is now colorful furniture and i LOVE it

THIS song is playing, all 15 versions of it.

2010-02-08T21:22:00.000-08:00

Throat still hurts, but im not barfing so thats a blessing anyway.

I always wonder why progress in this country takes so long. From fashion to infrastructure to amendments, everything happens to us a million years after they happened to the rest of the world.

Even a top-notch fashion magazine in India is p****ing up at the idea of permanent tattoos, they want the temp shit that firangs make fashionable; mehendi.

I don't like mehendi. Its orange, thats pissing off enough.
It stinks.
It looks horrible on white people.
It reminds me of school, when these oily-haired, lard-laden marwaari girls would walk in with hideous orange veins around their fat arms.... eyewww.

Today's TOI

2010-02-08T06:02:00.001-08:00

Yaaron Chalo !

2010-02-08T06:00:00.000-08:00

I hate being sick, especially on the Monday.
Although i am "sick" of Mondays in a sense.

Stationed near the sink with a mug of gorom jol, hating myself for taking that disgusting de-congestant syrup, semi-barfing every three minutes. Throat is raw and itchy. Hands and knees are shaking.

Worked till 3am last night and got some good shots of the JM Tribute.

Thats not the best one, but it'll look better when it's healed. Pug was a brave boy, only flinching 200 times to get to his cellphone.

2010-02-06T17:20:00.003-08:00

I need to quit sleeping at 6:30am

Just watched the farewell video i shot at Mithapur with my team. Howling like a baby, and have unsmartly elected to upload it on Youtube sans edits.

2010-02-05T09:59:00.000-08:00

Jai Hind.

Jai Jawan, Jai Kisaan, Jai Vigyaan.

I am a proud Indian. I am one out of over a billion other people in this vast, multi-hued desh. There is so much of it to see, so much of it to experience. Once again, i will refer to my historical Yatra and thank the experience for waking me up.

I love my country, i always did. How much i love it, how deeply-connected that love is with my life choices, is something that has been poking at my conscious off-late.

We are so damned overpopulated and under-developed.
Most of us are poor, illiterate and unwell.
70% of us live in villages that have little or no access to the most basic facilities.

We have so much hidden talent, and so much potential to grow, that it would scare the shit out of me if i were a foreign nation looking into India for the first time and realizing her strength and capacity.

No wonder the firangs are fucking with us !
No wonder o'l Obama's getting freaky with the outsourcing stuff, there are call centers in remote parts of Orissa now.

It is my dream to do something for this country that will make it stronger, healthier and happier. I don't know what that something is, but before i die, i sure as hell want to do it.

When i was a kid, i wanted to be a cop, detective or a prostitute. The cop, for obvious reasons "shoot the bad guys"; the detective because he got to shoot AND look cool; and the prostitute because she danced, helped nab the bad guy and found love/sympathy at the end.

Today when i watch the news and see Uddhav Thackeray make an ass of himself on NDTV while his lawyer shoots his mouth of on NewsX, much to the amusement of the surprisingly witty newscaster, i wish i had a gun so that i could shoot these jokers down, once and for all.

Im scared for Rahul Gandhi's safety. Not because i met him last year and fell head over heels in love with him, but because of the unfortunate trail of dead family members behind him, all of whom died while trying to implement things that were actually good.

Rahul Gandhi has potential. Oodles of it. And if i do ever decide to join politics, i'll be right by his side with a nice, warm gun in my hand.

Aaht Deco

2010-02-04T11:45:00.000-08:00

The low has left me, temporarily. Love is here

Le Mater chucked furniture at me in a good way, i am now allowed to rip apart, molest and otherwise makeover a perfectly droll piece-of-shit utility and turn it into orgasm-inducing sex-flavored eye candy.

FINALLY, i got shit to do that co-incides with the violent thoughts in my head.

Speaking of which, Karma's a bitch when it pops you in the eye, innit ? ;-)

Eyeww

2010-02-01T23:39:00.000-08:00

Had THE most uncomfortable dream last night.
Woke up sick, as in sick for real.

I am sooo not going to kill deadlines today. =$

On a more intelligent note, i am officially tired of chasing and being chased by people.

So for today, lets just leave each other be and take a breather yeah ?

2010-02-01T11:47:00.000-08:00

This video is for my beloved Peepray <3 I Wuv U

Been feeling contemplative lately, and to be honest, i don't like it. It is too much to deal with deadlines in realtime while your head's in another direction. Fucking pointless i tell you.

Post-Somdutta's rather strange narrative about a certain ex, im steering clear of controversy baby. No more bullshit, no more of that "remember the time" rubbish and most importantly, no more getting into this trap of "we're different people now, lets be friends and start over".
No Thank You.

I will not play safe when i resume work. I will take risks, most of them uncalculated. I will gamble, with money, trust and emotion. I will do everything i was told not to do, by people who were obviously shit-scared of my potential.

So yeah, I need a bike license, and the balls to drive my own car [hell it's been a year since i got my license ]. I need to figure out investments, the stock exchange and other shit relating to putting money where my mouth [isn't].

To end this on a slightly unrelated note, i have issues with the Indian family system and it's habit of constantly blackmailing people into following rules that nobody remembers making, and into fucking the shit out of potential change makers. This is not about my family per say, its someone elses'. And without mentioning names i'd like to extend my gratitude to the person involved, for being by my side, and for supporting me throughout the years. If there is a goodbye to be said, i will personally punch the shit out of your family for fucking with you. I will also extend an unfriendly, and perhaps unwelcome warning to the other side of your emotional fence. I do not like him. I do not trust him. And if he messes with you, i will unleash my rage on him and his kind in a way that kills him.

The Favorite Movie Post

2010-01-31T14:06:00.000-08:00

This is probably really random but i just feel the need to re-iterate - Peter Falk is awesome.

ALL the Murder By Death actors are superior to the current breed of so-called actors.

I tend to do repeat posts, i.e. rant or praise a particular film or person. Im a Taurean, its a habit.

Have been watching and enjoying my tiny collection of favorite movies.. here are a few of them.

1. Rock N Roll High School Forever - Read previous post for more information

2. Murder By Death - Neil Simon, Peter Falk, Peter Sellers, Maggie Smith, James Coco, David Niven... 'nuff said

3. The Aggressives - One of the best documentaries ever made on lesbian women, must watch.

4. Spongebob Squarepants - Each and every episode is a treasure :P

5. Abbot and Costello Meet Frankenstein, Dracula and the Wolfman - 1948, BW and hilarious

6. Serial Mom - If i were a parent, i'd be like this

7. Freedom Writers - Inspiring and 100% passionate. Hilary Swank is kickass [as always]

8. Legally Blonde - Very blonde and loads of fun, without being too pink on the eyes

9. Sleepy Hollow - Indescribably entertaining, plus Johny Depp + Christopher Walken

10. Madagascar 1 and 2 - For obvious reasons !

Loads more, but this is it for the month :)

TV serials [not the saas-bahu thingies, eyeww] are another favorite

1. Midsomer Murders

2. CSI

3. A Touch of Frost

4. The Madagascar Penguins

5. Coupling

6. Are You Being Served

7. Mind Your Language

8. Profiler

9. Columbo

10. Bones

Things to do tomorrow -

1. Figure out clothes and other stuff for the Vogue shoot [unfashionable me is being featured in the magazine]

2. Finish the damn A/V script for first film

3. Schedule movie watching date [Ishqiya, which will hopefully live upto the Bharadwaj standard of quality filmmaking]

Rock n Roll High School Forever

2010-01-29T12:00:00.000-08:00

This film = my life [as i would have liked to live it]

Fuck the critics, if you like rock n roll and are cheeky enough to walk that fine line between absolute grossness and total rudeness... ah whatever, just watch the damn movie. I'll even send you a copy, it is that worth it.

Funny as hell, with Corey Feldman in possibly one of his worst Michael Jackson impersonating wardrobes EVER, this is one film which keeps me entertained, and has been since 1991 when it first released.

Ronald Reagan High School is invaded by an interestingly named Vice Principal, Dr.Vader, whose sole purpose in life is to keep students in detention forever. That does not go down well with the "cool kids" aka Jessie and his bandmates. They create super-brilliant plot after plot to overthrow her, and when they succeed, the school blows up, literally.
The film has some of the danciest 90's music i have ever heard, with tracks like Love at the Laundromat [ridiculously cute], Dare Dreamer, I Yi Yi Yi Yi Yi [i like you very much] and a bunch of others. All super cool.

You will have to go through living hell in order to download it [took me a week], and since the soundtrack was never released, singles will have to be looked up and snatched off various rare discographies.

I currently have all the tracks by the band The Pursuit of Happiness, and this other song called "You are Mine" by another fantabulous but commercially unsuccessful band called Eleven.

Bloody hell, most of the deserving bands on this planet aren't understood or appreciated enough by the masses, that sucks. I just wish it wasnt so hard to get the music because i really really really want it.

On another note, got 3/4th of the leg tattoo re-done and the pain was worse. Watched the Rob Zombie version of Halloween while i was at it, and while it wasn't a patch on the John Carpenter original, the kid playing young Myers did a stellar job. I'd give it a 6/10.

January 2010

2010-01-28T15:21:00.000-08:00

Full of decisions, caffeine and film. All nighters spent alone with smoke spirals and Gregg Araki.

Instant coffee stuff is actually quite good, well, when you don't have options anyway :)

I've got this weird tripod-phobia which i will try and overcome tonight... there's something homegrown and natural about shooting with something that doesn't straighten and square your frame.

And GOD or someone like him, please help me fix my damn computer. I need to upgrade the damn thing but i can't find the fucking driver cds :(

Anybody know where i could download the driver for an HP 4255 all-in-one ?

Listening to this amazing band called The Pursuit of Happiness. There's something about "Im an Adult now" that rings so true.

2010-01-26T03:31:00.000-08:00

Been sleeping loads off-late, have a minor blanket addiction. Got Spongebob Season one and Inspector Morse Season 1 as well. John Nettles is leaving Midsomer after Season 13 i think, so that basically means RIP Midsomer. NOBODY can take his place, not Troy, Jones or Scott. They're cute, but they'd make pathetic Barnaby's.

Listening to a lot of Cliff Richards lately, and Savage Garden. I tend to stick to one particular album per artist, so Private Collection and the SG self-titled debut are on my playlist, alongside stray classics like Phantom, Jump and Land Of Confusion.

Republic Day always reminds me of DD National. I remember waking up super-early and being glued to it all morning. Now it's all about fancy music concerts [atleast in Salt Lake] and unnecessarily loud speeches by our operatic politicians.

Singledom ??

2010-01-24T05:55:00.000-08:00

What an interesting thought =)

2010-01-23T06:44:00.000-08:00

Today is obviously my day for blogging.
Tattoo is a little sore, but the color looks gorgeous..
Otter got some work done as well, will upp' photos of both our tattoos once they're healed.

Crashed and uncrashed. Discovered that Rahul Da's dad passed away last Sunday, was shattered. Had been meaning to visit Uncle and Aunty with some Christmas cake when i got back home. =*( Sometimes the worst part about having issues with people is the collateral damage that comes with it.

What IS it with January and Death ???

Last year similar stuff happened in January [4th - Ryan Freedom/ 17th - Debrupa]
This year its 17th- Jyoti Basu [in the same hospital unit where Debrupa passed away], 18th - Aanchal from school and as i learned this afternoon, Mr. Guha Roy Sr. This sucks.

I will miss Uncle. Feel awful about intending to meet him all throughout last year, and failing to do so. It's been a while since the band drama ensued but yeah, i don't feel as comfortable walking into the house and plonking myself downstairs for a chat. Confrontations and shit vibes i can deal with, memories are another subject altogether.

Im sorry.

2010-01-22T18:00:00.000-08:00

Ah damn, im getting all thoughtful again.Cold weather, no sleep and a bunch of smokes to the rescue again :)

The Tata Jagriti Yatra forced me to reconsider a lot of things. Being in contact and living with people who belonged to diverse backgrounds and beliefs has, i hope, injected a little tolerance and worldly wisdom in me. Talking about India and it's lack of development is easy enough to do with [other people's] data and [the media's] opinions, but to experience it, see it, live in it and with it, is a whole new kind of education altogether.
I may not have studied much in school, but i sure have an MSW in terms of practical, hands-on work!

Education wise though, i have decided to finish unfinished business. I intend to get college figured out. Not like im expecting it to open any real doors to perception, but yeah, some unfinished things should just be finished and gotten over with, and im guessing i could do with a few more certificates, which is pretty much all they are anyway !

The Yatra was a challenge to my mind, and body too. Living on a train for 18 days is NOT easy, no matter how much i will shrug it off when you ask me later. This train moves extra fast, and all the damn time you're rocking, rolling, sleeping, shitting, communicating, presenting and thinking; all this with 400 other people trying to do pretty much the same thing as you. Space is a luxury, as is a dry and clean toilet. I will carry extra sanitizer with me next time [thanks for letting us bum yours, Annabelle!].

Im pretty rambly now, so none of my stuff will be in order.

Yeah.

Fhat the Wuck ??

2010-01-22T17:06:00.000-08:00

Unexpected all-nighter, exactly 24 hours after i professed an undying love for my new zebra-print duvet and matching pillow [2 of 'em, just for me!].

Converting files is a cinch, esp' on a MAC, why did i ever fear otherwise ?

Linkin Park's Hybrid Theory is still the funnest album to wake the dogs up with at 5am, they get this super-emo look in their eyes and are hugged extra as a result.

January brings back weird, bittersweet, strange grey memories. They're like those irritating little viruses with locks on em that appear when you forget to "eject" the damn pen drive before taking it out. I have to individually unlock each little bitch before sending it to the trashbin. Damned memory won't disappear.

I have un-quit my nasty little nicotine habit, i like it too much. January has some upsides after all.
January brings back weird, bittersweet, strange grey memories. They're like those irritating little viruses with locks on em that appear when you forget to "eject" the damn pen drive before taking it out. I have to individually unlock each little bitch before sending it to the trashbin. Damned memory won't disappear.

We're all getting older, and yeah, things have changed, and most of our social lives are like those gold-plated revolving doors in fancy hotels, where people walk in and out, checking in and checking out, freeloading or paying their way...... why am i even writing this.

Some things however, do not change.
Or will this year prove to be the exception to the rule ?

I have so many randomly crazy songs hitting me from nowhere. Three Days Grace with "I hate Everything", Sugarcult's "Pretty Girl", Everclear's "Wonderful", Papa Roach's "Last Resort".... Man this is like 6am at H-Street all over again !

Wait, wasn't i supposed to be editing videos ?

GAH.

Well, im enjoying some quiet time after Lord knows how many months, and for some reason, i seem to be typing my thoughts out spontaneously as i think them. And now i think my typing speed is pretty damn good. :-)

RIP Debrupa and Ryan [they passed away last year], now Aanchal and Jyoti Basu. Damn i hate goodbyes without warnings. We Sindhi's take hours to say tata bye bye. Sindhi farewells are notorious.

Ok i will go dance now... making the most of the impromptu H-Street revival.

winter woes

2010-01-22T04:31:00.000-08:00

I wish i wasnt always so overloaded with things to do.

At one point, its awesome to be awake and learning all these new things.

But in winter, all i want to do is curl up in my blanket and go-to-sleep.

Last coupla hours in Kolkata

2009-12-21T12:06:00.000-08:00

Ok i am SO nervous and dis-organized right now that i HAVE to blog about it.

2 hours and im expected to be at the airport, in time for the flight to Mumbai.

Post-that i hope to have 2 hours of chill time, and then chaos reigns again.

I have come to dread and love travel .... am not sure about how enthu im going to be about it in 2011.

Missing xmas and new year's, away from home for the first time. Stuck with a large group of strange, and hopefully pleasant people who will be interesting, non-judgmental and hygienic.

Dont know what else to say now, i need to finish packing and maybe grab a coffee or something. The more i think about how im going to miss xmas fun, the more im beginning to regret applying for this thing in the first place.

2009-12-15T14:03:00.000-08:00

So.....

I made it to and from Goa in one piece.
The training period is over and the testing period has begun.

In which drunken phase of my life did i swear to myself that i would always, bloody always, take the rough road out instead of the easy one ?

Drama happened this time round as well, we had this one chick who copied the fuck out of all of us, and we christened her "Simon" [remember the game Simon Says?]. She took her disabilities to the extreme, and that pissed us off like anything. Its like one minute we have to cancel an entire day's shoot schedule to accomodate her [we did that quietly enough] and then the minute we reach our destination she spots some people she wants to bug [err.. hang on to... out with.. whatever] and just dumps us, to hell with our shoot ! The next minute im covering my ears while some innocent bystander says "we must admire her and support her courage and yada fuckin yada" and she's out there whining about how we left her out etc.

When it suits her, she pops the "im not regular" signs and out comes pseudo-charity. The next moment she'll copypaste everything you do like its some competition for "Clone of the Year".

I hate people who copy me. Hate isnt the best word but it symbolizes my desire to stick that person's brain into a meat tenderizing machine and grind it into those little sausages you see in the Pink Floyd video "Another Brick in the Wall".

Train journey was KICKASS.. i loved the surprise [2AC instead of the usual 3AC] and totally bonded with Usha, Sudebi, Debashree and Sarah. They're amazing girls and i am blessed to have met them.

Training went well, i'd recommend it to anybody who's interested in digital media and awareness. Trainers were fabulous with one exceptionally sad character who stood out like a sore thumb. Food was awful for most people but i didn't really give as much of a shit as a few others because my lifestyle and food choices suck anyway; this was an extension of what i'd eat on a regular work day. Accomodation shocked the pants off most of us but helped us bond in the end, although 45 girls sharing 3 bathrooms and 4 shower areas wasn't always the most fun thing in the morning, esp' when you've got class at 9am [and you slept at 4 !!].

Calangute Beach is by far my most favorite beach ever. In 2007, i checked out the freezing, icy blue North Sea and loved it, but this one's got Paradise written all over it in dripping Vindaloo gravy.

Georges' Restaurant and Bar in Panjim serves the most reasonably priced Pork Vindaloo ever, and it's delicious ! 90 bucks.

Souza and Lobo on Calangute Beach are expensive, at 180 bucks but you've got to take into account the atmosphere [candle light on the beach, sand in toes, hukah, the waves so close you can smell their saltiness].

Spicejet is the SHITTIEST airline ever, i hope they go out of business soon. Fucking morons.

Ginger Hotel is a cost-effective hotel with good service [though their internet is fucking expensive and wi-fi doesnt work, @1.66 INR per min]. If you have your own internet connection or dont require one, this is a good place to be. 3 nights and 4 days for 2 people came to 4500 INR.

Before i forget, special mention for Lionel and the Flying Dolphin Bar at the edge of Calangute.They had karaoke and before i knew it they were playing "Im Yours" and Ishani and i screamed and ran to sing. Very besura we are, but ah, what fun !

Apparently Tito's attracts weird crowds and Mambo's is classier. I dont enjoy clubbing but the girls who did head out told me this.

Food discovery - Squid, Bibinca

New things - ate Goan food, shot animated film, danced on beach, sang karaoke, worked alone on our day off, didn't get involved in ruckus.\

Hated things - Simon, Smelly loos, Smelly bed, Smelly Simon shoes, Smelly fish smell, SuperSmelly Spicejet

Loved things - Participants, Solano and Kurtlet, KAVITA JOSHI, RUCHIKA MUCCHALA, VENITA COELHO, BISHAKHA DATTA and a bunch of kickass people. Special mention : Asif Basra :)

More later im developing a migraine,.

No more nee nee baa ba

2009-11-17T16:21:00.000-08:00

I cant sleep.
No matter what i do, i just cant get to bed.
Not until the sun is shining irritatingly in my face, and the servants are screaming orders at each other between the three floors of my house, does some part of my brain say "ei shaala, ghumao".

Its not the Zynga addiction thats doing this, although i do admit to serving plates of VooDoo Chicken Salad between posts.
Very happy with the super-slider burgers but am afraid that Mr.Boob might use them to catch up with me. Im 3000 points ahead of him, ha ha.

6 days till Goa, and boy am i nervous ?!

Everyone i've spoken with about the project is like "wow you get to go to Goa" and im like "yes but not for pleasure". They don't believe me.
I can't believe im bitching about travelin
g ! Something's wrong with me post-Delhi. Maybe its the whole "people are strange when you're a stranger" thing.
3 days on a train with a bunch of unknown women from the North East, whoa. Talk about a mini Bigg Boss.

Speaking of which, what is wrong with the guys on Big Boss 3 ? Are they all emomental ? That Rohit Verma dude puts our local Rohit to shame with his melodrama, and Vindu Dara Singh is an asshole, plain and simple, the MNS guys should hire him as one of their hecklers. I am rooting for Raju, Bakhtiyar Irani and Claudia [the latter as a Kolkata girl]. Last time my vote was for Ashutosh Kaushik, who won. For Rakhi's Swayamvar i knew Elesh was a winner the minute i saw him.

Hail reality shows. We bitch about them and useless NGO's file baseless allegations against them, only to unwittingly fuel the TRPs of the shows in question.

Bigg Boss, Rakhi, Pati Patni aur Woh.. just a few shows that have benefited thanks to the efforts of people and organizations who want to pull them down, for the flimsiest of reasons.

Having said that i do have a few concerns about the kids on Pati Patni Aur Woh, but have discovered that their biological parents are a step away, watching the show as it happens. Still, its kind of stupid for parents to put their little kids on a reality show, but whatever. People do stupid things all the time, and being moralistic and tight-arsed about something thats not going to affect my life either way, is for "younger" people to whinge about. Im on Level 2 now.

Kit Kat

2009-11-15T03:27:00.000-08:00

FINALLY taking a break
Am happy
Dont care about bloody whingers, atleast not today
THAI SPA here i come ! :D

Random closet rabid

2009-11-12T09:27:00.000-08:00

Shit happens

Takes me a while to let it sink in, so im a late crier.

Nearly lost a parent there, don't know how i would have dealt with it if he had passed on. I pretty much always stay pissed at him when he's around.

Missed Delhi, and am getting shitloads of work done instead. Papa's in hospital again tomorrow, so hoping that everything is sorted in his heart. I don't understand medical stuff.

So far so good.

Burp-NOT.

2009-11-03T15:27:00.000-08:00

One thing i absolutely hate while traveling on work is the food.

NOTE : i said traveling ON WORK which means that arrangements and meals are figured out by the organizers, not me.

I AM a foodie yes, but the kind that likes "good food". Not overly oily, salt and spice deficient lumps of vegetables and semi-raw meat plopped on dirty, scratched plates like blobs of shit [and possibly tasting like it to, those who have tasted shit will know better].

So far my "Travel Cuisine" has been an absolute disaster and i earnestly beg organizers to please consider allowing picnics where we cook for ourselves [i cant cook for nuts, but hell i make good cheese maggi and great eggs], or just bloody give us food that is actually half palatable.

Am dreading the travel i will indulge in over the next few months. Delhi is still ok because Ankit and an army of friends will be around to "save" me. But so far no reliable networks in other states.

Speaking of travel... where's my frikkin suitcase ?

cough

2009-11-02T03:35:00.000-08:00

I officially hate Microsoft. Crap OS.

Apple is the BEST, though shit expensive [auto upgrades make it all worth it]. I am not upgrading to Snow just yet, maybe next year.

Upping videos after centuries. Damn XP hung when i tried from the Desktop so here i am, waiting for my Cafe World Pizza to cook, while quickly and easily upping stuff i shot in 2007.

Getting the N73 was a stupid decision, i regret it.

Jai Ho N72. Its not hi-fi like the N73 thank god, and so much better to shoot with. Wonder if the N85 is any good ? N95 sucks, has the same slow-starting/hanging problem that most Nseries phones have, barring the 72.

Chhandak reckons i should give the D300S [or something like that] a shot, it does video too. Mamu thinks the D90 is better. Im confused, and gladly so. Will bug both blokes for trials before i settle.

Waiting for Otter to upp the photos i took of the Nakamuka Night =D

Voice is still fucked, i hate sore throats more than runny noses.

Nakamuka Nakamuka Nakamuka

2009-11-01T10:56:00.001-08:00

Oops i did it again.
Stayed up and enjoyed the one solitary night-off that i've had in months, enjoyed self and didn't sleep.
Now i have lost my voice AGAIN, and am burning up inside while my nose gives the Niagra some serious competition. Duur shaala.

This dude will crack you up even when you're down and out as hell. India has Raju Shrivastav and America has the Late George Carlin, Russell Peters and Jeff Dunham.

Gaana Bajao

2009-10-27T22:12:00.000-07:00

If i were to choose music that has literally shaped the events in my life i would include the following artists in my "album" -

The Beatles
Cliff Richards
Queen
Daft Punk
Depache Mode
Linkin Park
Duran Duran
Marilyn Manson
Genesis
Good Charlotte
The Hoosiers

For some reason, i dont think Pink Floyd, Nirvana or the Doors made much of an impact. Sadly, with their genre of music and with the hype around them, everyone around me was obsessed with them. That made me a bit sick, as in they really got "into" the idolizing. And when Kolkata gets down to idolizing people, shit is going to stink twice as bad.

This post will be continued.

Focus focus

2009-10-24T23:54:00.000-07:00

Something's wrong with me. I catch a cold every alternate day and that sucks. Almost got to popping Lemolate like candy but quit just in time, in favor of gag-inducing gargling with hot water and delicious tulsi tea.

Found all my Magic Lantern Docu's !! Joyous weekends await :P

Pity there's not much material on CSA out there, that 1 hour film with the filmy music in the background is pathetic and most of the people featured are nasty as heck, would rather jump off the roof screaming than approach them for anything.

Speaking of docu's, i met Mamta Murthy the other day, quite by chance. T'was an honor, and quite refreshing to have finally met someone who "speaks" about the issue coherently.
I liked her film, but think that it is more elitist-centric and hence would not work with the audience we have in mind.
Save the abstract art and the "think for yourself" stuff to the overwhelmingly Aantel population in the city.

Aantel = pseudo-intellectual

Lage raho

2009-10-02T09:00:00.000-07:00

Its Gandhi Jayanti and all i can think about is Munnabhai.
Is that wrong ?

Am i that major a media whore ? :(

Yoodle e ee oo

2009-10-01T07:21:00.000-07:00

OMG i havent written anything since September 7th !!!
Didnt realize it had been so long :$

Anyway, im not posting just because there's a chance some people might drop by, but more because i can't f-ing speak ! Yeah, lost my voice after 4 years of chuckles, cackles and really offensive language.

So much has happened over the past couple of months that im not sure if i'll manage the energy to put it all down but here goes anyway.

MAC Snow Leapard has finally released as has Windows 7 ! Nearly drove a lotta people nuts at B'bswar when i stuck through an hour's debate between the two. But yeah regardless of how much Windows tries aping Apple, i'll be an apple addict for life. <3 Snow doesn't do too many different things, but then again it didnt have too since Tiger [2006-7 version i think]. There's a new Apple kit up for grabs which gives you this awesome video feature on the IPhoto, but sadly, it's 10 grand and im not rich this year. :( Ah well, thank god for Nokia .

Ooh and btw, Windows 7 is about 6grand odd, and Snow is 1,800. Haha !

Watched this really shit scary documentary today, called "Hardcore". Its about this Brit lady, Felicity who flies to LA to be a porn star.
My primary thought throughout the film was "how f-ing dumb can these people be" ?
I hate being judgemental but sod it, i am.
She's a single mom for crying out loud, and she wants to be a "fuck me" star ? Come ON. I feel bad for the silly twit but i will not shed tears when her "conditions" [no anal, no gangbangs] are stripped from her. She knew exactly what she was getting into from the start and i feel awful for her daughter.
The gora's always have "choice". When i was in England, i learned through my voluntary work with Miss Mui that pregnant teenagers [unmarried] get free "EVERYTHING" and a 150 quid stipend too. And what do these wannabe mumsies spend the dosh on ? - a 29-inch flat screen tv.
Oh and they still can't spell "birth control". Despite their free education, which compared to our wonderful Indian standards, is private school grade.
GAH.

Yay that was fun, i havent ranted publicly in ages ! =D

I feel so Lenka

2009-09-07T05:46:00.000-07:00

Im just a little bit
Caught in the middle
Life is a maze
and Love is a riddle
I dont know where to go... etc.

The Happiest Day of my Life

2009-09-03T22:40:00.000-07:00

Is today !

When i learn all that i want to
Feel truth for what it is, bittersweet but anyway
See people, pretty and otherwise
Quell the burning rage which would otherwise tear them to nothing

Woke up to a glorious morning, much-awaited phone calls and a sneaky 2-shot breakfast [Paan!]

There are times when you cry, not because you're happy or sad, but because you "know".

AATMAGYAN.

The Andra Pradesh Chief Minister YSR, died suddenly in a chopper crash. Who couldv'e foreseen that ?

Things happen like that - Poof ! Boom ! Splat ! Crash !

Sounds like that old Batman series, innit ? :)

Sunday Sniff Snizzday and OOH Movie time

2009-08-30T10:12:00.000-07:00

We've sent a short film to the UNCRC thingie. Thank you TC and Dhruv for being supportive !

TC and I will sit together soon and have a long, honest chat about a couple of issues ive got to deal with in regard to stuff that i can't plaster on an open-to-all blog.

I believe i have what is called a sinus problem, according to le doctor, but am thoroughly confused as to what that means. If it indicates at my waking up sneezing and being unable to breathe at night, then yes there is a chance of my being a victim of the sinus thing.

Quick Gun Murugun is a film that i'd like to watch soon, it has been ages since i sat in a hall and munched on caramel popcorn and slurped that really awful thing they call a "cold drink" which is in reality 1 part cola syrup and 3 parts water with shredded ice if we're lucky enough.

KFC cold drinks are exceptionally divine btw, i guess they have the mix right.

Here is the film, comments are welcome. Might i add that there are TWO, yes, TWO films that we made, one was via Chhandak and the other through TC.

This is the TC one as we're experiencing technical trouble with the first film.

Argh-ness

2009-08-22T19:59:00.000-07:00

Uh Oh i think my blog's gonna be invaded verry soon.

So before i get asked questions that im not willing to waste time answering, here goes -

My Blog is called "Cuntradiktion", which isn't actually an offensive [read "sexist"] term. It contains personal thoughts, reflections and rants and while i have no issues with people dropping in *hint hint* from other blogs to read what i have to say, i would appreciate minimal commentary on my use of language and choice of topic. As is obvious, Cuntradiktion is a cheeky "pubes meets friction" take on life and it's err... comings and goings ! It is totally personal, and yes i mean what i write.

Lets just consider [for those of you who have met me in person] what im like, in terms of how i react [spontaneously or sleepily, depending on who you are and how little i've slept] - this is pretty much a written, word-for-word substitute for the "real" Pranaadhika.

And no i still will not give a fuck about what you feel i should not do, and what i should not approach.

And yes i am still sick, and struggling with deadlines.

No i will not quit smoking cigarettes.

Yes i do have a slight affinity for vintage "everything"

No i will not tone down my language.

I "MAY" shoot a movie in December.

Puberty calls me a WHAT ??

2009-08-19T17:07:00.000-07:00

When in school it was absolutely unheard of to call someone "Slut" until and unless the girl in question really deserved it, as in REALLY.

1. She approached your school crush before you did = bitch !
2. She got him to ask her out = bloody bitch !!
3. She didn't have to, he fancied her + approached her + took her out = slut !!!

Or worst of them all ... He asked YOU to tell her that he liked her [he being your next door neighbour] = Hair Tear Royale #$@%

Confession - This was me in Class 5 :@
Im laffin' now but then it was late night sniffles [at 8pm] over hindi emo songs [akele hum akele tum and such]

My neighbour Amar, btw, is now ensconced comfortably or otherwise in the US. He is a fat chartered accountant i hear, and has lost his charming little lisp.

*tee hee*

So yes, i had nothing better to write about at 5:48am on a thursday morning so ..

I miss the following characters right now

Tweesday

2009-08-18T12:26:00.000-07:00

Rahul's inspired me to try my hand at cooking !

Actually washed chicken the other day and it wasn't as bad as i'd imagined it to be , well of course it was C3 chicken, not Beck Bagaan chicken, which is not really discriminating against the o'l dead bird, but simply stating for a fact that frozen, packaged meat is easier to clean than stuff thats been chopped and dumped in a plastic bag with blood and guts oozing out like a bad hindi movie fight scene where the bald hero's head is predictably split open with an iron rod which has to has to has to materialize out of nowhere during the dhishoom dhishoom and crack him bang in the noggin so that all that red egg-yolky stuff comes popping out. It's only corn starch and red dye with a little raspberry sauce [the latter being for the Tesco friendly films, i.e. Brit ones], but it almost always makes me want to jump into the screen with a spoon and scoop some off his "bleedin 'ead" for my dessert.

Mummy is pleased that i am now spending time doing "her" stuff, which involves downloading British murder mysteries [Midsomer Murders and Columbo being her top two after Poirot] and watching them with her, while plying her with bowls of ice cream topped with Rahul's special chocolate fudge sauce, which i humbly admit, is miles better than my poor offering.

Work is tops and Health is the pits. Not the most comforting thing to say before peak season, but what can we do ? My system will tolerate jhaal puchka from anyplace, be it dingy Kalkaji in Delhi or Rippon St. here at home; but cold/hot weather ? Hell no. I must fall ill, i must catch a cold which would be tolerable, if not for the marathon runniness of my nose and eyes TOGETHER.

They are like India and Pakistan i tell you. Two bitches, bitching non-stop.They run together, two streams down my face, salty and therefor confusing for Mumble who really cannot distinguish between the two while she is trying to wake me up in the morning. Maybe she likes the taste of both, the silly cow.

Right now i am so tired i could cry and laugh together, and then fix a nice bowl of steaming hot noodles with the remnants of Rahul's spicy prawn curry, and a little of that chocolate mousse i sneaked away. I so want to get started on Law n Order SVU Season 3; haven't watched even half an episode and it's been two months since i got it.

=( Well im not supposed to be ranting about having a peaceful life with priorities, right ?

Damn.

Disturbing Youtube video on Hunger

2009-08-12T14:07:00.000-07:00

Ok i belong to the priviledged lot that can afford any cuisine for any meal at any time.
THIS video made me lose my appetite and choke back guilty tears, because i waste food a lot and don't care about it.

Mamu sent it to me, said it was a "good film", "worth sharing". Yes it is indeed.

Of EarthQuakes and Doomsday 2012

2009-08-11T03:21:00.000-07:00

Is Doomsday 2012 for real then ??

Maybe it's all bunkum, propagated by half-assed attention-seekers who claim that it's "all in the books", meaning that God/Allah/some other vague religious know-it-all predicted it eons ago.

Then again, the environmental havoc, the 3, yes THREE earthquakes in the span of 10 days, the climatic change.. everything seems to be culminating into one big disaster. December 21st 2012 apparently, is when Kaboom! there will be hell.

I never bothered much with Doomsday prophecies and such, figured that 9/11 and the subsequent "sightings" of the devil's face on the WTC and other rubbish was giving jobless people opportunities to play fortune-teller.

Here's some information -

2012 Possibilities

Human

Flu Pandemic - it might not be swine flu, but flu researchers say a deadly pandemic is not a case of if, but when.
Nuclear War / WW3 / Biological War - although the Cold War is over, and less bunkers are being built, the threat is still very real.
Large Hadron Collider - scientists tinkering with something they think they understand the risks of, but what if there's a 0.000001% chance their black hole calculations are wrong? Is it worth the risk?
Nanotechnology - while this might have health concerns when used in everyday products (ie sunscreen), the doomsday risk is when self-replicating little thingies are developed. Search for "grey goo".
Religious Apocalypse - or rapture, or "judgement day". Most religions predict such a day, but atheists have nothing to worry about.
Nuclear Accident - nothing is foolproof. We've had such accidents in the past, and a bigger accident is totally possible.
Rise of the Machines - somewhere between Terminator and I Robot is an easy prediction: robots one day will have the capacity to rule the world. Are we stupid enough to allow it to happen?
Genetic Modification - we blindly take vaccinations, and we might be sheep when it comes to "gene therapy" as well. Our desire to live longer might just be our undoing.
Time Travel Error - someone from the future ventures into our past and causes a conflict in the time-space continuum...

From Space

Nearby Supernova - experts say that no supernova candidates are close enough to harm us. But how many supernovas have they observed?
Explosion from the black hole at the center of our galaxy - read about how something similar could have caused the recent tsunami
Gamma Ray Burst (GRB) - a 2004 study told us that a GRB from a distance of just one kiloparsec could destroy half of Earth's ozone layer.
Asteroid/Meteor/Comet - ancient, advanced civilisations have one distinct advantage over us - they may have observed the skies for longer, and may have spotted an orbit that will culminate in a collision with Earth in 2012.
Coronal Mass Ejection (CRE) from our Sun - typically expected to merely cause power blackouts and wreck satellites. But do we really know how big they can get?
Cosmic Rays - a pet favourite of mine. Either an increase striking our atmosphere, or a weakening of our shields. Either way, more cosmic rays would be silent killers.
Solar System Falls Apart (butterfly effect) - to the best of our knowledge, everything is OK for a long, long time. But throw a stray comet or Planet X into the mix, and our solar system could turn into a catastrophic pinball machine.
Alien Invasion - no evidence, but plenty or believers!

From Earth

Magnetic Pole Shift - this is something that scientists state has happened before. They suggest it takes thousands of years and does no harm. They are wrong - it could just as easily happen overnight. No mechanism is known for the cause of the magnetic poles swapping places.
Crustal Displacement - a physical pole shift.
Supervolcano -these are real, they have caused great catastrophes in the past, and we have no idea when the next eruption will be. Some believe Yellowstone has been exhibiting signs of unrest.
Ice Age - right now the buzz is about "global warming", yet a mere thirty years ago we were worried about an impending Ice Age.
Global Warming - it will only take an increase of a couple of degrees to make life very difficult for most humans

Above information courtesy - www.survive2012.com
Flu Pandemic .. WWIII... Genetic Modification - Uh Oh
There's a lot of information and a number of perspectives available on the subject. Most of it, like i said, is based in myth. I am awaiting the comments of the new-age Nostradamus's.

May the debating BEGIN ..

Elaan - Combatting CSA since 2001

2009-08-08T13:02:00.000-07:00

It has been so long since we started working.

No funds, no guidance, just plain white hot rage juxtaposed with enough common sense to make it through 5 years of group work.

No money was doled out to us . Nobody was around for us to piggyback on. No experienced guides to act as facilitators while we set the base for something that hadn't been given much attention before.

I feel no need to tug at people's heart strings, begging them to look at me. No need at all.

We will fall, and rise. And fall again, and rise yet again.

There is no room for negativity.

This bird is happy. :)

Back in Black

2009-08-07T11:28:00.000-07:00

Home Tweet Home

Back to bhodro bangla city, where the traffic is slow and the people are lazy but steady. Ok im not making much sense.
Its just that after three weeks of roughing it out, home feels like heaven.

10 days of work and peace at home, and then off i go again.

I just realized that i am not particularly fond of traveling 24/7. :$

Ack.

2009-08-03T02:15:00.000-07:00

Finally homesick. Officially craving 2 fat dogs, 1 fat otter, 1 fat hukah, 1 most excellent AC and tons of alone-time.

I miss Kolkata.

Ankit and i stayed up last night watching Whitesnake and Mr.Big videos. I have seriously underrated Whitesnake in the past and am now re-discovering them with a vengeance. It rained and the cooler sprang to life as if by magic ! I actually finished a bottle of green apple flavored vodka while Ankit, ever the Punjabi, stuck to rum. We talked and talked while Mouse snored, and i realized that of the 100's of people you meet, there are only about 5-6 people whom you will actually connect with in the true sense. I will miss him terribly. :(

meow dilli burpp

2009-08-02T02:39:00.000-07:00

Stayed over at Ankit's last night.... all four of us

Still here, cannot move bum - too much lassi and makhan waala alu ka parantha. Aunty still insists on cooking us lunch, thereby tempting us to expand our girths a few more inches.

Delhi today is HOT, as in H.O.T. Even Kolkata fails in comparison, and since the coolers are ineffective, we are sweating it out, happy because of the food, and dealing with the heat by smoking.
Not so smart eh..

I must return, even though im not too fond of it. Work happens here. If legal measures are to be implemented, this is where the decision-making will happen. If the central government's attention is to be attracted, this is the place to do it.

I stick to this - Long distance does NOT work.

Yeh Dilli Hai Mere Yaar....

2009-08-01T07:23:00.000-07:00

CR Park is Kolkata Pt.2 . The puchkas [pani puri/golgappa] are sanitized, and the paani has ice cubes in it. Kolkata puchka ZINDABAD.

The people are strange. They yell and curse for no reason, but have been extremely polite towards moi so far, even the Jats, who are Tarzan by size and Barbie by brain.

The women, the ones ive encountered, are weirdly very aggressive. I don't know why. They dress up and drive awesome cars, and have great jobs, but sadly, they are rude, bitchy and downright fucked up. Not all of them, just the CEO types ive had to meet.

Have made some awesome friends here. Ankit, Faith, Blaise, Aditya - :-)

Change Looms 2009 was an unexpectedly fabulous experience where we learnt about the ins and outs of the social development industry.

Yes, "Industry". In Delhi my friend, everything is pure business, there is no room here for group hugs and warm cups of tea. If you ever meet one of the huge organizations here, do not expect empathy.

Travel is high on the cards, and i am sort of happy about it. Packing is not a favorite activity and i loathe certain living arrangements. Then again, we're "social workers" right ? :$

Delhi weather sucks, and Delhi men cannot seem to get over the fact that women have boobs. They stare and stare till you wish they wore bra's on their balls like Superman. Strangely the average shop keeper, security guard and joe on the street are civilized. Its the upper crust spoilt boys and the lacherous uncles who are the problem !

Instead of AC's which i love, there are coolers in Delhi which quite frankly, do not live upto their name.

Another strange thing is that the interiors of these posh homes are pathetic. The car however, is top class and very expensive. Kaku had said this to me and it rings true.
Ajeeb.

Traffic - Would you believe it, Kolkata traffic AND humid weather rules over Delhi. The traffic here is awful, and it doesnt help that people do not know how to apply their brakes at the right moment. Bikers beware. I speak as one.

Food - Punjabi khana rocks ! Butter chicken is an obvious favorite, but it is the ghar ka khaana which rules. Ankit's mom is cooking authentic punju khaana for us tonight and we're all psyched =D Lassi , Ghee paranthe and foooooooooooooooooooooood ! Where Kolkata fails for lack of variety, Delhi spoils you for choice with pretty much every available cuisine. Must visit's so far for me -

Big Chill Cafe - expensive but totally worth it ! Irish cream cheese cake woo hoo !

Chaska - our local resto bar with above average butter chicken and sinful dal makhani

CR Park Mkt. 2 - Dadu'r chop dokaan for bangaali egg chop, fish fry etc.

Punjabi by Nature - expensive but worth it for the ambience and excellent service

Nirulas - a classic, for decent pizza and inhouse chocolates

BBQ Nation - again! VFM yaani ki paisa vasool

Ankit's house in South Ex - entry by invitation only :D

Ive cut my trip short because Mumbai beckons. Another week here would've helped me unwind but sadly thats not about to happen.

Dilli mein kaam chalti hai. There is no time for adda and certainly no room for the emotional atyachaar i go through in Kolkata. To an extent it is comforting to know that Dilli is to become a second home, but overall the thought of living there gives me the creeps. The trials and tribulations of the country's rats are obvious and the demarkation between the have somethings and have everythings are painfully prominent.
If you're not willing to shed your ego and laziness and join the race, you are not welcome to Dilli.

I have to run now, Dilli beckons.

Randumzzzz

2009-07-16T10:17:00.000-07:00

Forced self to sleep.. woke up feeling 10% more apprehensive.

And there's a silly fucking bandh tomorrow. Fucking jackass politicians.

Kicked AG's ass at pool, now for Otter's.

Habitat Center ??? Us?? Performing "live" acts ??

2009-07-15T13:48:00.000-07:00

Sometimes, thinking out of the box can be such a bitch.

Fuck. I am so nervous.

Catharsis

2009-07-14T11:48:00.000-07:00

There was a time when every close friend's words of advice to me went like this , "You think too much, Stop thinking".

Well, it's taken a while, 5 years to be exact, but i think i have finally got the hang of it !

I feel light, and colorful. Maybe i'll stop wearing black all the time and put on something a little less dark for a change.

Maybe everytime i see something that reminds me of the things i lost in the past, i'll smile to myself and thank god that i had it, even if it was for a while.

Maybe, just maybe, i will quit being so competitive over pool and just enjoy the sound of the balls going *plink plink* instead of freaking out because i didn't pocket them. [yes otter,this is kind of a confession. im obsessed with perfecting the game].

Something's around the corner, and i don't know if it's a real monster or the cookie monster. All i can gauge so far is the stench of change.

I hate change.

I hate it when my cup of coffee isn't respectably unsweet, i hate it when the shower freezes up on me, i hate it when the MAC hangs just when im about to pocket the 8 ball....

I suppose that you almost always fall in love with the things you claim to hate. Almost always. Fatal Attraction ?

*wink*

To all the Ignorant Fuckers who...

2009-07-13T13:04:00.000-07:00

Think homosexuality can be "cured" via yoga, meditation etc. - FUCK YOU

Think only girls are sexually abused - FUCK YOU

Think that being hindu/muslim/christian is more important than being happy and a good person - FUCK YOU

Think "human rights" don't apply to less priviledged people - FUCK YOU

Think hiding is better than telling the truth - FUCK YOU

Im right pissed now. These endless debates between religious assholes and politicians about who has the right to stick it into whom, are getting to me.

It is unfair. In a heterosexual relationship, cheating is not considered offensive.
But one man sleeping with another man? Haaawwwwwwww

And never mind how invisible the women are in Kolkata. Of course they're around, duh. Why aren't they out there ? What prevents them ? Can these issues be resolved ?

We won't know until we stop being ignorant.
And that, at the moment, seems to be what our leaders want us to be.

=)

2009-07-12T13:23:00.000-07:00

I love Ryan and Sean !

Mudhouse Blues Pt.3

2009-07-11T11:25:00.000-07:00

I draw on my hands and legs a lot. Mostly when people are talking about their relationship issues and i am like "not again" because if your'e part of a healthy relationship in which both members are individuals... then duuh you will have problems.

That made me realize, Papa is 67 and Mummy is 61. Shouldn't they be my grandparents ?

Weather was total KLPD today. Thought there'd be lovely evening jhor and all, and that we'd dance around on the table like otter and i did the other day, but bhuk. :-(

I have this friend with a problem, and when she spoke about it during our session it kind of hit me - "a lot of people have this problem".

For the first time in a long time, Rashmi used a series of strange words in one spoken line, which made me feel like a CIS student again.. Pathos, Tragic, Insecurity, Justification, Manifestation, Complex, Self, Symbolic, Needs, Desire.... Baba.. sounded like Poetry class all over again with Keats ramming his godforesaken but poignant Odes down our vodka-drenched throats !!
Ah Keats and his Odes. I never want to see them again.

Jason Mraz's spoken word - Now thats something i could wake up to and fall asleep to !
Especially this one -

Live version, im sure Youtube has a better one. This however, is the exact version that i listen to.
I want to witness a Jason Mraz concert LIVE before i pop it.
He is a lyrical genius.

When it rains, it fucking Pours

2009-07-09T20:54:00.000-07:00

I cannot make proper black coffee.

It is either too strong or tea-colored and weak.

The sky reminds me of London in the afternoon, gloomy and glumpish.

Have exactly 30 tasks to accomplish today, without a nap break :$ that is most unfair really.

The rain has made it almost impossible for us to commute by bike, and there are these snaky traffic jams which just HAVE to occur when we're already late for a meeting which is at the other end of town.

Oh wait, I am at the other end of town. :(

I like Salt Lake better than i did before, btw. Have found a puchka waala who does not snigger at my need for less salt and more nimbu and exactly a drop of paani instead of a drowning soggy puchka [hate those].

Ah, it will rain heavily this afternoon. I shall get my garam khichdi with alu bhaja for lunch :)

=D

2009-07-09T13:16:00.000-07:00

Bruno releases tomorrow !!!

Boomerang

2009-07-08T11:13:00.000-07:00

I do not like lectures.

Not at 2 in the frigging afternoon on an empty stomach.

Anyhow, i am now better-equipped to handle JJA related information, so thats good. Enjoyed hanging out with fellow coalition members and sharing notes.

Ice Age 3 has finally released, or so i've heard. Must watch ! I love Sid the Sloth.

On a personal note, everything is going as planned, couldn't be more on track and in-sync. I sometimes feel foolish while thinking about past times when i wasn't a particularly good judge of character. Time changes, and people change with it. I too, have changed, and it gives me immense pleasure to think of how easy it is to fool people.

Ultimately toh there is no point in bitching, absolutely none at all. For a while it IS a lot of fun, but then again, pulling people down was always more entertaining than pulling them up.

But yes, mistakes have been made, big ones. And as it is with most things in life, what goes around will eventually come around, twice as hard.

How true that is.

Oh, KFC has come up with this amazing concoction called the Virgin Mojito. Must try !

To my favorite engaged couple .. this is for you . :)

Inspiration

2009-07-07T13:30:00.001-07:00

I hate compliments.

Compliments are so fake.

I mean, you can NOT believe them anymore

Compliments are like arseholes after a rajma-chawal meal

*Full of G.A.S*

Snide remarks however, are different.

When someone is being cusid, it shows

And it is not fake.

In fact, bitchiness is a true sign of honesty

It shows you where you stand, literally.

Now take this "person" for example. She obviously has issues, external and otherwise, and chooses to vent online, on a social networking site. Her rant is about me of course, and involves matters which seem to affect her negatively in some way. Something about what i do and when i do it seems to make her think that my behaviour merits a reaction from her. She no longer likes me, that is obvious, but is for some reason, unable to show her disdain to me when we bump into each other in public places [this is Kolkata, you bump into everyone at some point of time or the other].

Strangely, she gets this scared look in her eyes when she sees me standing a few feet away. She dashes, to the boyfriend or a "temporary best friend" [she has a lot of those hanging about] and takes comfort in their presence as if that would prevent me from beating the feeble stuffing out of her. I admire her online ranting, but wish it would give her some courage, a little backbone and spinal cord perhaps, to charge me directly, like normal people with guts do, rather than cluck about like a chicken that is about to be eaten for lunch.

Her friends , who at one time were my friends, and very nice ones too, are the same. The poor things just refuse to take things beyond random online bitchiness, which, does nothing but inspire me to do better. Online they are invincible, armed to the teeth with snide comments which i suppose, if directed at them would reduce them to tears and remind them of how empty and lacking in self-esteem [among other things] they are, and how sorry they look, clinging helplessly to people who will use and throw them like expired credit cards.

I am not angry, merely musing openly for the first time, at how absolutely overfull this generation is, with people who really, should not be breathing. I am an ok person, but yes, i too have limits, and i have sat back and watched this charade go on for too long now. It is unwise for a person or persons to provoke another for prolonged periods without provocation. Bull and bully i am, and to constantly wave bright red flags in front of me will most certainly elicit a reaction which will be merciless and damaging.

So please, tread softly.

Goodbye Michael - and FUCK YOU haters

2009-07-07T11:45:00.000-07:00

Now that Michael Jackson is dead, the critics are suddenly changing tune and going on about how he was a victim, not a perpetrator, and about how big a legend he is/was/will always be.

Remember the time [pun intended] when Michael was branded ? Yeah , as a child molestor. Some ignorant folks went so far as to call him a pedophile without realizing the difference between a serial sex offender and pedophilia.

What happened to those accusations all of a sudden ?

I love Michael Jackson and his music was one of the highlights of a childhood that was later to be filled with dancy poptrash such as Britney-Christina, 5ive-Nsync-LFO-Boyzone etc. He will be missed dearly, and as i type this, people are paying tribute to him via a concert etc. which i WILL NOT WATCH because i am afraid it'll break me down.

So yes, back to the critics.. what happened guys ?

Bitching about stuff without knowing your shit didn't get you paid enough ?

Is mourning the dead a way to get into Page 3 ?

Like, you finally realize that people don't listen to critics unless they're spineless asswipes ?

Good Job.

He's dead now.

RIP Michael, and your apparent "ghost" which has been sighted and presented as "breaking news" on every channel, lol.

BEST tribute to Michael Jackson ? - The ones on the streets by the fans, just plain regular people dancing away and lip-syncing to his old tunes at this stage where the Jackson 5 first performed as part of some contest which they won. Michael was 5 years old then.

Hehe

2009-07-07T01:56:00.000-07:00

kis taraf hai aasman
kis taraf zameen
khabar nahin !

- Dostana

I had this crazy, and i mean CRAZY dream last night.

I can't write about it here, too public.

But i WILL state that it was on the lines

of.......

THIS !

More pride Photos !

2009-07-06T03:18:00.000-07:00

Otter's Pride Pics !

Must See -http://www.facebook.com/ext/share.php?sid=101322383489&h=agIpf&u=7UJFO&ref=nf

Kolkata LGBT PRIDE 2009 - Historic and Colorful

2009-07-05T11:03:00.000-07:00

What a day.
What a parade.
What Pride !

Rain dampened nothing, everyone walked, banners in hand, abir on their faces, with the cops looking on with a sort of quiet respect for a change [usually they joke around like chengraas]. I hate writing like some cliched aantel but the air WAS thick with pride and brimming over with emotion.

Rajarshi da, Aninda, Santosh, Pawan and numerous other activists spoke on stage about how the time had arrived for change, not only legal, but also in mindset. If the mindset remains the same [as with gender and power, hence rape despite the law], nothing will really "change". The law might change but it'll be like one of those singing talent shows where the person is splashed all over the news for one week and poof! he/she vanishes; end of story.

David Bowie's "change" and RIO's "shine on" are playing on loop in my head as i attempt for once, to upload photographs at the right time, something i loathe. I am not a particularly good photographer and there was so much hugging this one and kissing that one and posing for the media going on that i pretty much snapped up whatever was in front of me.

Wasn't able to wear hat due to rain, but got abir-faced bigtime, and pranced around with the flag printout that Anjali gave me. Anupam's bihari gamcha [in Rainbow colors!] helped me get the look of the day just right.

Met a lot of friends and senior activists, and watched an impromptu street theatre performance, which was a brave, heartfelt attempt which sadly, was pretty much ignored by everyone.

Mouse, Otter, Anjali and I did quite a lot of checking out, heh. What absolutely beautiful transgender people there were ! With exquisite hairdo's, flawless make-up and just the right amount of padding,this one transgender person who looked like Kareena Kapur had me drooling quite a bit !

Headed off to a bar with music [im being nice] with Pawan, Anupam, Rohit [hot one] and the rest of the SAATHII crew, where we jiggled and drank to a fabulous, queer-friendly future.

Got home to vanilla ice-cream drenched in creme-de-menthe and chocolate sauce, and FEDERER WON !
So yeah, it's been an awesome day.

Here's the link to my pics - Gay Pride 2009

Mudhouse Blues Pt.2

2009-07-04T13:39:00.000-07:00

Patricia Cornwell. Absolutely fabulous woman. My favorite author for the moment.

This is the exact same cover of the book im reading now -

On Page 239.

Her latest book, SCARPETTA is out on the stands at double price *gulp* and i hope to get it before Dilli.

Often wonder what it would feel like to be Dexter. Kill the bad guys, just the bad guys. Nobody knows, nobody has to know. They didn't pay for the hell they caused, and thats not fair right ? Be a true social worker and clean out societal garbage before they screw up again.
Fuck the stupid morality bit, skip it. It doesn't help solve shit.
After all, if you "know" someone did it, and you have proof that people just won't look at because they're pathetic victims of the system [who get paid to be assholic zombies], then what other choice do you have ?

Turning the other cheek ?

Pride March Kolkata 2009 - countdown

2009-07-04T10:33:00.000-07:00

I usually suck at uploading stuff, primarily because i dont particularly fancy the idea that my life and schedule can be tracked via this blog and Facebook.

For Pride Week however, i will make an exception.

We have been celebrating the recent "reading down" of Section 377 by the Delhi HC and are hoping that good things happen for the LGBT community in the near future.

This is what we got upto this afternoon. M was busy enjoying his afternoon siesta, but allowed me to paint him and give him glitter hugs.

Thank you Otter, Ridhi, Rahul, Sanju, Punju boi and Jr. [pug too] for chipping in.

Tomorrow marks a historic day in the time of Gay Liberation in Kolkata. Will be one of the few times that i will walk without whining.

P.S - It appears that a number of organizations and individuals have made errors while speaking about 377, which incidentally is NOT an "article" but is in fact, SECTION 377.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Section_377_of_the_Indian_Penal_Code

"Thank you" to Facebook associates for the clarification, although i would not wish to be sensitized by them under any circumstances other than the fact that they cleared the error via the link i put up on FB.

BBQ Nation !

2009-07-03T10:28:00.000-07:00

OMG.

I had no idea the city had a place like this, else i would have jumped in immediately.

www.barbeque-nation.com

You MUST check out the one nearest to you.

Great food, awesomely reasonable prices and variety too !

377 is History , like Michael Jackson [ok bad joke]

2009-07-02T13:44:00.000-07:00

Yaaay !
What else can i say ?
Been part of the movement since i was 12

Have seen gay friends and their families struggle with this apparent lack of normality in their lives, have watched helplessly as they have conformed, most unwillingly to societal chains....Have struggled to understand bisexuality and lesbianism, and have been angered and confused more than once over the lack of a female voice to the L of LGBT [that problem still persists btw].

We need love and harmony.
This is just one of many baby steps toward it.

Sorry im rushing, am making rainbow stuff for this Sunday's Pride March =D

More C'est Moi

2009-07-01T06:49:00.000-07:00

Looking forward to Shahana's birthday bash this eve

Mouse is snoring and reciting Mraz-ology in his sleep, silly bugger.

Off now for a bit, dancing to Twisted Sister and Michael Jackson ! Today feels like a saturday :)

I love you Michael. You will forever be a legend, a pioneer, and above all, the only real "entertainer" in the music biz. RIP

* I wish people would quit pulling his life to shreds even after his death. Media people, show some respect! *

Also, i don't know how many people liked Farrah Fawcett but i certainly did.. RIP

Strange isn't it, that these people died without notice, and good o'l Patrick Swayze's still hanging on ? Elizabeth Taylor too, and Suchitra Sen.

C'est Moi

2009-07-01T06:06:00.000-07:00

For Shekhar

2009-07-01T06:02:00.000-07:00

Maw,

*whack*

*slap*

*pun-geeee*

Ah, now we get to the point.

This is the only time that i have actually felt really really bad after a friend has switched base.

I miss you bitch.

mudhouse blues

2009-06-30T16:33:00.000-07:00

ALL of us at the birdhouse are nutting over Jason Mraz and his kickass music. M has this usually irritating habit of looping everything he likes and it pisses me off, but this time round it helps us pick up the lyrics of the often uber-fast paced narrative.

Songs to download/buy , whatever your conscience tells you -

Mudhouse Blues

10,000 Motherfuckers

Im Yours

The Dynamo of Volition

i am happy. everything that happens, and is happening, is slowly but definitely lightening the chaap which has otherwise burdened my brain for the past coupla years.

My life is now downside up, and ive come a long fucking way from the year 2000.

It no longer hurts to let go forever

In fact, its exactly what i need to do

Goodbye Unbearables. RIP

My Male Kari

2009-06-29T07:00:00.000-07:00

Taken while on holiday.

I can safely say that the best pictures i took were of people and disaster.

snizz

2009-06-28T23:15:00.000-07:00

when it is raining and you have a runny nose and itchy throat, it is not good.

i want to play outside :(

RIP Michael Jackson

2009-06-26T01:29:00.000-07:00

Michael Jackson has passed on. Away from the media circus, away from Liz Taylor, away from his three kids with weird names.

He truly was, is and will always be, the KING of pop music. Nobody makes music like he did. And it is doubtful that jacko impersonators will ever make history like he did [no pun intended].

His music constituted a large chunk of my childhood, and i remember fighting with Surabhi over which song we were going to dance to, from "Dangerous", watching in awe as he moonwalked, turned into a hideous grinning monster in Thriller...

Heal the World and We Are the World are by far, the most heartfelt shows of sympathy for the state of the world during hard times. Michael Jackson and Quincy Jones were instrumental in organizing USA for Africa, with Sir Bob Geldorf taking it on from there [Bandaid '84].

Now that he's gone, i hope the media will stop prying into his life like a bunch of hungry vultures.

RIP.

teri toh..

2009-06-24T12:37:00.000-07:00

Its been ages since a tv serial has blown me away like this one has. Never, not even in the time of CSI or Law and Order SVU, has a fictional character made so much sense to me, despite being an out and out antagonist.

Dexter

The guy is a blood spatter analyst by day and a serial killer by night.

The thing that sets him apart from your average Bundy/Gein , is that he only kills the bad guys. In other words, the ones that got away with murder.

Is it worth it ??

2009-06-24T05:57:00.000-07:00

Im not sure.

For some reason bad things happen the moment a close friend gets into a relationship.
I don't understand it.
It bugs.

Take A for instance. His last girlfriend turned out to be a spineless asswipe, and to be concise, hell broke loose when the relationship came to an end.
Now A is with B. She is smart, beautiful [as in drop dead hot] and perfect for him.
Sadly, friends are out of their social radar as they now need to get to "know" each other, solve problems and just generally "be alone together".

Thats like a whole different side of them right here. At first, hanging out and chilling together is priority and now suddenly it's not. There's a doppelganger on hormones that needs to be satiated and there's nothing you can do about it.
Although you want to.

I wish relationships, new ones especially wouldnt turn close friends into the CIA. Its not like the problems between two people in love are vastly different to regular buddy problems.

Ive been in a relationship for 4 years now which is crazy, and the thought of us-time quite frankly gives me the heebeejeebies. Id much rather chill with friends AND him than just him. Just him is fine [and very erm... eventful] but yeah... maybe im not the average "dump everything for love" boyfriend/girlfriend obsessed type or maybe ive seen too much of a good thing. I dont know, im confused.

Possessiveness is one of my bad traits.So is my sometimes "foot in mouth" disease.
Oh i dont know.
I hate changes in plans because my good friends, now "new couple", need to "talk".

I want to eat puchka with them. =(

Random Media

2009-06-17T23:42:00.000-07:00

Haven't bothered following up with various journalists over past interviews etc, so am using my blog as a sort of future reference tool for when i need to make printouts etc. This heat is fucking getting to me.

Street Sexual Harrassment

Band Management

heat rash

2009-06-16T04:48:00.000-07:00

Fucking dying in the heat.. humidity actually.

Got back from much-needed vacation with crazy people, and am trying my best to get back into the Kolkata groove.. without success.

The heat is just too much to bear. To add to that i am suddenly unused to, and therefore extra agitated at the staring tactics of middle-aged bengali men, most of whom [in Salt Lake] sit outside shops in groups and chat about shit and then stop midway as they spot me alighting from the bike.

Nearly got into a confrontation with a bunch of them last night, fucking frustrated staring jobless assholes. What the fuck do they see in girls half their daughter's ages ? And the way they STARE..... man.

Sweating in an air-conditioned room and praying for winter.

Each time history repeats itself, the price goes up

2009-05-09T05:37:00.000-07:00

Of Launch-pads and tampons too

2009-05-05T11:53:00.000-07:00

I am in love with the following bands, post-numerous viewings of Channel V's highly-controversial show about bands that have "it" in them to be the next [Sooperfuzz?] ... etc.

Reverse Polarity

Faridkot

Prachir

Workshop

Reverse Polarity is a complete package. They have what it takes to be a truly original band, brimming [or swimming] with attitude, spunk [yeah =D] and a sound which is new to the stale Indian music scene. None of the participating bands attempted to do what Reverse Polarity did ; i.e. introduce an underrepresented voice to the contest , the voice of a screamer/growler. Gaurav is fabulous and never skips a beat, never backs down to Vishal's often strange questions.
I want this band to win, they deserve it.

Faridkot was my first love. The initial attraction began with the never-been-seen before Sardar rockstar in the form of IP Singh, who, although not stereotypically a "rock" star, is a star anyway. IP oozes charm, even in his slightly off-tune moments, and the band performs like a unit on stage, which is not something i could say about the other contestants who looked either desperate for attention, or just plain uncomfortable.

Prachir came as a surprise package, and it is sad that their bassist left, for whatever reason he had. I love their video, and consider it to be the first bangla rock sound that is actually "new", the rest is just boring old mish mash [PS - This comment excludes the musical contributions made by Lakkhicharra, Phoenix and Prithibi]. I hope to see these guys on the scene more often, we need fresh young bengali blood on the national music circuit.

Workshop is hilarious and demonic [ha ha]. I loved their cover of Like a Virgin, and Sahil "legend" Makhija is fabulous, like a young Britney. I mentioned this somewhere, and stick to what i said about Launchpad not being an appropriate platform for this band, they are way beyond contests and reality shows. In fact, of all the four bands which i have mentioned, Faridkot and Prachir might require some attention but not RP and Workshop.

So yeah, i love Gaurav , and i want Reverse Polarity to win.
If they don't, IP uncle, go take the cake and toughen up a bit, i agree to a degree that Faridkot's music isnt exactly rock, but it's good and original.
Both bands are young and full of hope and talent.
Vote for them

There's no after-party

2009-05-04T08:42:00.000-07:00

Chilling and having a blast is on my list of To-Do's for the whole of this year

A lot of things pop up here and there which would usually cause worry, sadness or even a feeling of betrayal but im so high right now, it doesnt matter.

For example, work.
My former team of work mates [and friends] have started their own deal, which includes focussing on issues which i sort of initiated when we worked together.
I say, Good Going, and Good Luck ! All the best with your new venture, guys. I hope things work well for you and that you achieve all that you are working towards. :)

Family.
Jaivant, post-typhoid, has now crashed headlong into a gypsy with his [crap] Avenger and is nursing a broken arm and leg.
Big brother couldn't make it to the party.
Neeraj thinks im dinosaur material.

Also, Hair.
I danced in the rain last afternoon with 13 other crazy people. Forgot to tie hair and it now resembles a badly-made nest.
Ah well.. rain densh !!!

Everything is wonderful now. The garbage has been cleaned away, and all is well in the land of the Penguin.
I am glad that there is closure in all departments.

Birthday happiness !

2009-05-03T13:04:00.000-07:00

My birthday last year was nothing compared to this year's festivities.

Kick-Ass celebration i tell you ! Well maybe i fill in details later as i havent slept much and the party is still on, 27 hours later

Awesome crowd, people i can hang with and trust, no drunken bullshit, my papa and mummy trudged upstairs to cut 3 of 12 cakes .. i have my own stock of wine, chocolate and cake for the rest of the season.

Highlight was the rain this afternoon when 13 of us jumped in puddles, danced and froze !!

Im glad that things have changed, and that some people are no longer a part of my life.

Have major appointments and lots of counseling/proposal-writing to catch up on. Parents are as happy as can be, and i am over the moon even though i lost each of the 6 UNO games we played this eve, over rose soda and hukah

Yes yes, more later.

Here are a "few" wishes left on my FB status message, from friends and associates. I feel honored to be remembered by so many

Riju Ghosh at 3:59am May 3
hey happy budday........

Ananya Ria Roy at 4:17am May 3
HEPPY JONMODIN!!!! Hope you have a fantastic year ahead of you :-) x

Riyajul Haq at 4:25am May 3
happY bday

Lana Hicks at 4:32am May 3
Happy B-day girl! have a good one :)

Shantanu Ghosh at 4:50am May 3
Many Happy returns.Have a great year ahead.

Shama C Noorani at 4:53am May 3
Happy Birthday!! xx

Jason Andrew Philips at 4:58am May 3
hey ponchi, enjoy ur day n have a good one...tc n stay safe...

Faris Khan at 5:05am May 3
happy birthday!

Rahul Basu at 5:05am May 3
Wow.... Happy Birthday Pingu!!!

Gairik Roy at 6:40am May 3
many many happy returns of d day..

Madhuri Ajay Wagle at 7:00am May 3
hey poncheeeeeeeee, many many many happy returns of the day... tightest ever hugs and lotsa luv.... have a blast....

Mark Cleaver at 7:21am May 3
happy birthday to you xx

Asha Parekh at 7:23am May 3
ponchee! Have a great birthday....:)

Ankhi Maulik at 7:31am May 3
Happy Birthday!! =)

Neeha Bose at 7:57am May 3
♥

Rituparna Borah at 8:07am May 3
a very happy birthday!!!!

Anupam Sen Gupta at 8:26am May 3
happy birthday. have a blast. cheers

Sawan Dutta at 9:42am May 3
many happy returns of the day! :D

Pratim Roy at 10:01am May 3
hey thrr.. happy buddayy.. cheerssss...

Tannika Majumdar at 10:02am May 3
Happy B'day Birdy.....heard evrything..missed evrything.....:'(

Kushal Sarkar at 10:02am May 3 via Facebook Mobile
Happy birthday dude !! Have an awesome time !!

Raj Rehal at 10:11am May 3 via Facebook Mobile
Happy Birthday.!!

Ajit Kumar at 10:13am May 3
Happy B'de, enjoy and utilise the prime age of youth

Riju Dasgupta at 10:25am May 3
hey happy birthday

Mahua Ghosh at 10:26am May 3
Did late nite after a long time n really had a blast...

Ahmed Aziz Safwi at 10:27am May 3 via Facebook Mobile
Happy Birthday. Have a fantastic one.

Purbita Dutta Gupta at 10:27am May 3
Happy birthday! Enjoy!

Shruti W. at 10:28am May 3
happy happy birthday!

Neelabha Chatterjee at 10:39am May 3
happy bday Ponchu...god bless and take care..*hugs*

Reshmi Bhattacharya Bose at 10:44am May 3
2 leeeegggzzz gudddd!:D muah heard u n ashi r buddies gr8! tol her wat a pagli adorable sweetheart u r,she's da same!

Rajesh Chaudhari at 10:50am May 3
Happy Birthday Pranaadhikha...Hope all your dreams & wishes come true. Cheers!!! RC

Rohan Solomon at 11:05am May 3
Happy birthday , Have a great day :)

Onir Anirban at 11:15am May 3
HEY BEST WISHES FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY...HAPPINESS AND LOVE FOR YEARS TO COME.
ONIR

Subhangi Subramanian at 11:16am May 3
Happy Birthday! Have a good one! XO

Harsh Khorana at 11:20am May 3
is I invited to ze partay?>

Sandhya Sridhar at 11:25am May 3
Happy B'day! =D
Hug. :)

Mrinalini Chakrabarty at 11:31am May 3
Happy Birthday! ;)

Aneesh Wagle at 11:50am May 3
hey ponchi,happy b'day.......yenjoy your special day

Vedant Jallan at 11:58am May 3
happy birthday... have a blast!! roll!

Max Galstaun at 12:09pm May 3
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU..

but I wish I could wish you in person.. All the best, have a great time...

Mel Bee at 12:09pm May 3
many happy returns of the day hon.. hugs n bday bumps to u :))

Deepak Gupta at 12:21pm May 3
Wishing you many many happy returns of the day !

Sourabh Samadder at 12:21pm May 3
Happy Birthday

Anirban Chaudhry at 12:23pm May 3
happy bird day pingu

Priyanka Chand at 12:34pm May 3
Happy Birthnday :)

Sohni Chakrabarti at 12:34pm May 3
hey!! happy budday!!! hope you have a blast... i'll see you in june!!!

Anjali Samtani at 12:40pm May 3
Hey pengu!!happy birthday :)

Sayantan Biswas at 1:12pm May 3
Could you PM me your email ID?? I wanna send you yesterday's photos which you might/might not post. ;)

Basundhara Ghosh at 1:24pm May 3
HAPPY BIRTHDAYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Akanksha Sharma at 1:30pm May 3
ehy well..happie birthday!!!! enjoy :)

Tanya Sen at 2:01pm May 3
happy birthday!

Abhinanda Mukherjee at 2:05pm May 3
happy birthday ...

Rahul Chowdhury at 2:08pm May 3
hey many happy returns of da day!!

Aveek Ghosh at 2:10pm May 3
Happy birthday. all the best

Arindam Haldar at 2:17pm May 3
happy birthday ! have fun!

Ambarish Lahiri at 2:19pm May 3
Congratulations on your B'day.may you have many returns of the happy years in the times to come.

Ambarish Lahiri at 2:22pm May 3
Congratulations on the cherishing memories of 23 summers of your life.may you have many more enjoyable summers to come in the life ahead.

Manish Pratap Singh at 2:37pm May 3
happy birthday!!

cheers!!

Susmit Nath at 2:51pm May 3
Happy b'day...\m/

Abhishek Chanda at 2:56pm May 3 via Facebook Mobile
Hey happy 'Bird'day...

Madhu Agrawal at 3:02pm May 3
happy birthday to you

Supriya Baijal at 3:02pm May 3
hiiiii didi me is gud wat bout u

Akshay Raheja at 3:20pm May 3
happy b'day

Sunayana Newar at 3:58pm May 3
Hey you...Happy Birthday! Shine on!!

Girish Billore at 4:01pm May 3
Happy birth day

Kaustav Saikia at 4:14pm May 3
heyyy..sry couldnt make it :( sum work cropped up.. hope you had a blast! will meet up soon anyways.
and once again HB2U!

Abhishek Jalan at 4:22pm May 3
happy birthday!!!

Reshma Sambtani at 4:42pm May 3
happy bday dahling!

Lokesh Bakshi at 5:03pm May 3
happy b'day :)

hv a gud one :)

Biplob Dutta at 5:37pm May 3
ullhas!!!!! many happy retuurns of the day!!! have fun gal....

Rajesh Gupta at 5:42pm May 3
Hey , Bird , Happy B day once again .... we had a good time last evening ... BABY NUN was special :)

Howard Pereira at 5:47pm May 3
Bappy Hirthday!!!

Srinivas Honnavalli at 5:53pm May 3
hey many many happy returns of the day.....cheers

regards
Srini

Gaurav Chauhan at 5:57pm May 3
hav a good one wish you a v happy bday

Barkha Kaul at 6:09pm May 3
happy bday.........good luck

Dipanwita Das at 7:11pm May 3
happy birthday ponch! i am back in town and we must must meet! much love. xxx

Moushumi Dewan at 7:51pm May 3
Happy Birthday Ponch! Have a great day and a great year!

Anjali Wason at 7:54pm May 3
happy birthday pranaaadhika! hope you had a wonderful day!

Archita Chandra at 8:09pm May 3
heyy gurl..happie birthday....party hard..... ;o)

Karan Bellani at 8:20pm May 3
Hapy B'day Pranaadhika... :) ... hv a great year ahead..

Saloni Drolia at 8:39pm May 3
happy birthday.....cheers!!!

Aditi Naithani at 9:37pm May 3
Happy B'day gurl...hope u hav a great year ahead :)

Debashish Adhikari at 9:38pm May 3
Wish u a very happy birthday. May God bless u

Nandita Gangwal at 9:40pm May 3
Happy Birthday

Divya Chadha at 9:54pm May 3
hey u...wishing you a very happy birthday!!! hope you have a great day and year ahead xx

Precious Madeira at 10:15pm May 3 via Facebook Mobile
happy birthday..hope u had n havin a great day..

Arthur Cardozo at 10:54pm May 3
Happy B'day!!!

Jack Jigg at 11:25pm May 3
stay a mad penguin everyday there is no reason you should limit it to once a year :)

Amber Vahidy at 1:07am May 4
hey babygirl ..Happyhappy birthday dear. Sorry i forgot your gift but here'ss a kiss and a hug. its virtual but its heartfelt . dance away your new year and smile all the way babe. i love you. MUAH

PRE-BIRTHDAY TWITTERS

2009-04-30T09:30:00.000-07:00

For once in my "i need a break" existence, i am putting my feet, wings and flippers [+ beak] down and taking a break.

4 hours of unadulterated, no-phone-zone pleasure. Scrub, Rub, Dub Dub, Flub flub and Va vaah Voom !
I shall emerge polished and shiny. =)

The month has been major in terms of drama [cop station visits, lost thousands, a con man named Aninda Sil] and fun [Aninda Sil paying me back, new cop "uncle" friends, reaching target monthly earning of 50G plus] among various blossoming relationships etc. Oh and i am off caffeine, as in completely.

Prepping for good ol' birthday party, speaking and negotiating with caterers/decorators/bouncers is my new skill and it is occasionally fun to play the drama queen and flounce about while people pick up where i left off.

Otter, Mouse - Thank you for tolerating the flounciness. Cannot have managed to be drama queen without you.

Spider is back in town and is picking up part of my booze tab, fuck how sweet !! :)

Paul just finished M's tribal sleeve and it looks grand.

I have picked up a coupla isspecial things as a pre-birthday gift for moi and moi Otter. Honey Mustard being one.... *slurp*

Till further notice, i am eating dinner with parents and watching Bones Season 2

Muah

2009-04-25T12:51:00.000-07:00

Im just so tired.

I want to hang up my chappals and hang loose for a bit.

But life won't let me.

If it isn't business, it's non-profit, if it's neither its some emotionally-draining family drama which i really dont want to be part of.

Spongebob Helps.
Spongebob SAVES.
Jai Sponge.

Maw

2009-04-17T12:02:00.000-07:00

Im tired.
And i want a nice warm pair of arms and a strong chest to fall into.

Good morning BITCH

2009-04-16T23:47:00.000-07:00

I woke up this morning and decided to blog before brushing my teeth.
Its like letting your mind defecate before your bum does.

I like crunching bitchy people for breakfast.
They're spineless in person, hence easier to digest.

I am officially enraged with this city. The humidity bears down far more fiercely here than it does in any part of the country, and the pollution, traffic, smelly people and hypocrites add to the general feeling of being choked.

Bengali women, semi-educated, cotton-sari'ed and gathered in groups , are far more effective at eve-teasing than the humble chengraa. Bitchy comments, raucous laughter and pointless motions of shying away when you glare back at them ; way more wrath-inducing that the now impotent whine of "hey hello, hey sexy". RIP chengraa bhai, you will be missed.

Id love to continue this rant, and work on the finer details of what fucks up Kolkata but i'll probably eat lunch in a while and be content with doing what the average Kolkatan does instead of working - Ledh Khaawaa [being a lazyass siesta-loving slob].

I hate Kolkata and its people for the rest of this year.

2009-04-15T15:04:00.000-07:00

Usually i am the last person to shut down emotionally , but i guess there's a first time for everything.

Quite contrary to the Linkin Park songs i would break down to, i feel nothing except a dull throbbing in my right ear. The time is not right. As Peter Seller's character said in the hilarious spoof "Murder By Death", "something" is most definitely "wong" here.

Growing up is something i wish id never done. Adults are so overrated. I wish i could head back to school again, with a slimmer waist, tons of homework and delicious, lip-smacking canteen food.

This whole year has tried messing with me. It has had its good side too, with self-sufficiency reigning supreme [fat wallet is always a good feeling]. Im not as much of an idiot as i was, but im still an idiot.

I so wish i wasn't one.

People no longer value honesty and ethics the way they used to. Everything is dirty and underhand and yet the surface looks so clean. Scratch a little and blow the camouflage off and boom ! People don't look so clean no more.

This person i met recently was all smiles and polite grins, till i got caught up with committments and unintentionally delayed something. The nice girl turns into a right prissy BITCH and goes into cow overdrive with her oh-so-subtle comments. I revert with politeness and a tiny reminder of my humble background. She bitches back with "i have also worked with NGO's for 2 years i understand the scene". Im like, yeah so what did you do ? Gather brownie points and certificates to help your career as a journalist with what is obviously the most Page 3 oriented newspaper in the city ?!

God the way people think they know it all is annoying.

Good thing though, that there is no time to think about the controversy-inducing "ex friends". I feel no pain, and have no regrets about the differences between last summer and this one. I mean, come on its been a year. If i had the time and no bitchy journos taking their frustration out on me, maybe i wouldve' cared a little.
But where's the time ?

IN all honesty, i think this is what you call forgiveness. It requires no words, no explanations, no falsity-laden bear hugs .. none of that.

Im so tired of the city and its idiot people, and its only April.

Oh hell hell hell.

The dreams where i am dying were the best ive ever had

2009-04-11T14:09:00.000-07:00

I feel weird.

One of many haunting sounds

2009-04-07T15:30:00.000-07:00

Slept at 10:30pm woke up at 4:00am

Have loads of writing to catch up with, but im still somewhat groggy and not upto it.

Tori Amos is ethereal.

Sunderday

2009-04-05T11:20:00.000-07:00

Today was hectic as ever, but i did manage to relax for an hour and a half.
How ?
Simple : I left the cellphone at home, right next to the laptop !

RESULT ? - P.E.A.C.E !

Spider did a really good cover-up tattoo over a really bad sword design. Here's a piccie

Chilled with Juliet and Chinese, Mouse and Spider and drove around, smoking numerous menthols and stopping to buy some pastries etc. Ordered the most delicious blueberry cheesecake from the Hyatt and promptly forgot to fill in spa registration form. Damn.

Pulled out new UNO cards to play at Golden City but cracked a few politically-incorrect wisecracks , thereby resulting in much table-shaking laughter. Game over. :$

All my life ive wanted to be part of a family. Rich, Poor, Famous, Notorious, it doesn't matter. Home is where the heart is. This year has been great in terms of actually connecting with my family without being forced to. Buji dada [Somdev] and i have always gotten along and apart from his awful American accent, i can still stand him ;-)
Now i got Remy, Pradyot dada and a bunch of other cousins i always had but never really connected with.
Im glad i did.

I dont know enough about my heritage to be completely proud of it. I dont even know the language well. What i thought i knew is not true to my tribal roots, its a fancied up part of something ive thought of as being "my culture".

The problem with Agartala and the North-east is that people dont regard it for being the paradise that it is. Culture vultures have failed miserably when it has come to toasting the North Easterns for their invaluable contributions to the country.

How many of us here who have the money and membership to the once-exclusive Calcutta Club, actually know that one of it's founders is from Agartala ?

How many of us still say "oh North-East maane Assam" ? I mean, hello, your parents paid for your geography lessons, look at the damned map again.

I never really felt this pissed off at fellow Indians till last evening at the Junction where this gigantic map of the North-Eastern part of India kept staring at me.

In Kolkata, where people pride themselves for being so intelligent and up-to-speed with both culture and history, its a shame that not many people know much about us North-Easterns. In fact, the whole deal with NE India seems to be only about Assam and Tea Gardens, and little half-truths about people there eating everything from cockroaches to dog puke.

Here's a little incentive to start Wikipedia/Youtube and Google again.

Im tired, and have grandmom's birthday party to figure out tomorrow + a tattoo consultation with the fabulous Gabbu of the Bangla Band "Lakkhicchara".

Life's good mostly, and for me it's been hectic. I need a thai spa so bad. Juliet and i might head there tomorrow morning. My hairlined ankle [Rishi dont tell mummy] needs some lovin'.

Hug for my beeg, uber-cool dada who might read this [fresh lime n dead animals onda house!]

Phew

2009-04-03T11:53:00.000-07:00

Pj's leaving tomorrow . I hope he does well in Bumbay [PJ style] and kicks some ass there. Here he was used and thrown by the people he worked with, and his potential pretty much dropped off the radar

Will miss you PuppyJyo

Have had the most hectic week ever, and the heat is still on.

Loads and loads of things to do this weekend and my usual crash-out and binge Monday is to be filled with my grandmother's 86th birthday bash, which she refuses to downsize

Too tired to type.

I now know why some people need drugs to keep them pepped up and alive.
Im knackered, and all i got is potato chips and CSI

uh oh

2009-04-01T11:40:00.001-07:00

If we die tomorrow, the company that we are working for could easily replace us in a matter of hours. But the family & friends we leave behind will feel the loss for the rest of their lives.

Interesting point. Im kind of in danger of doing that with regard to my grandfather and my dad :(

Pretty Girl on Sugarcult

2009-03-30T12:58:00.000-07:00

I actually had a good day after ages

Listened to some great music, crashed the car [again] but it wasnt so bad and the guy we crashed into was quite sweet .

Met this awesome female, Maneka, over coffee and laptops at Flurys. Hoping to tattoo her soon.

Mansi is most upset over the recent spate of incest cases that have been springing up in the media, but im not. I mean, the fact is that Child Sexual Abuse and Incest have been plaguing the world for ages... way before 24/7 media was conceptualized.
That doesn't justify shit about the issue or perpetrators,its just plain fact.

Got a disclosure today about a 4 year old who was raped repeatedly. It came randomly, over milkshake and bbq potatoes. Again, moved but not shocked.

I need to keep going, and not give up the fight. Some Elaan members need more time to deal with new emotions, so the weight is still on my shoulders. It doesn't bother me too much.

Im ok now.

Good Morning Revival

2009-03-29T22:38:00.000-07:00

By far one of the most underrated songs in recent times.

This one got Kailash Kher the recognition he deserves. What a voice !

This one's...well... awesome music !!!

I am just randomly happy today =D

Maw

Hands Clean

2009-03-28T06:52:00.000-07:00

I love the way silence speaks volumes

The same way we keep messaging furiously on text or Facebook, but clam up the minute we go face to face

two people in one room

testing and trying each other's patience and endurance

nobody saying nothing

its all so loaded.

Khattam hua

2009-03-27T11:48:00.000-07:00

I waited.
And it was pointless.

Never condone a bad attitude.

Never look back.

Never feel bad for doing yourself a favor.

Butterfly

2009-03-26T15:13:00.000-07:00

Im honestly so tired of being the little martyr, the one that gets taken for granted and left to clean up the mess.

It sucks, and im not taking it anymore. In any sphere of my life. No more.

Yes, i do run a charity , and that leaves room for a little "other people's shit" to hit me, thats ok, thats acceptable because its based on an active choice ive made.

But not the rest of me darling. No.

I dont' give a fuck about what 99% of this city's population thinks of itself, bloody shite actors on stage with no talent to speak of, little boys addicted to eu de pussy so bad it's fucking with their thought processes, overgrown no-talent assholes who will screw everything up including themselves.... please.

IM OUTA HERE.

Enough is fucking enough of other people's shit in this stupid but beautiful city.
Ive got a plan and im carrying through with it.
Those who would like real change, in their lives and in their bank balance, should put their whore cards down and follow me.
The rest, just leave.

The end.

Hard out here for a P%$#

2009-03-25T14:17:00.000-07:00

DAMN i miss Ash so much right now.
Pretty much the only person who will ever get what im saying when i say Hustle And Flow.

Not just a movie, Not just a bunch of black guys doing what the ignoramus thinks a black person would be doing [rapping, raping and smoking up].

I dont know how to put it correctly, but i will just spit/say it like it is -

1. Kolkata has a fucked up attitude to work
2. Work culture here sucks as a result
3. Time is wasted
4. People are not motivated.
5. Something is better than nothing is the attitude out here.

And those who make it, or bother to struggle for the stars are labelled or bitched out of business.

I mean, WHAT THE FUCK ?

I tried IT. IT being Information Technology. SAAAAD business, marwaari and corporate whore dominated. Pathetic. I did make a little money though.

Music came next. People's attitude sucked. They want to be known as rock stars when the only tune they can play at soundcheck has been written by somebody else, no individual talent or interest barring "imitating the lifestyle they show on VH1". I fucked it up too, by letting self get dis-illusioned by what is obviously a potential-filled but highly inconsistent, namby-pamby state of musical genius in this city. If its not classical rock or covers, or bangla, it wont work.
Well fuck you too.
\m/

Next up, my own deal. Art. Social awareness.
Sure thing, works for me.
How about some family lovin' then?
Nope.

Ah well.
I shall continue to Hustle.
And soon enough, when you're stuck with your sad life, and your boring kids, i will flow.
With respect, happiness and money baby.

There. Im done.